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Mash the Gas

Who: Americon, Bitbucket, Fusillade, Jetfire
IC Year: 2029
Location: Golden Gate Bridge, Earth
TP: Human Nature

(June 2029) Humanized Fusillade dabbles with attempted vehicular homicide before finally getting enough of an earful to realize that she's in serious danger, too. SCIENCE CONTENT WARNING! Check this out for potential list of maladies that might strike hyooman clones!


Golden Gate Bridge

The graceful span of red steel that spans the harbor is still called the Golden Gate Bridge by the majority of the citizens of the city it is near, its official name long since forgotten. The curved double roadway, while not the main artery of trade into the city, is still a vital link to the outskirts of the city across the bay, as well as many of the wilds areas that still exist in the midst of this urban sprawl. It is also the main conduit for traffic to and from the EDC compound, located on the far side of the bay, across from San Francisco's main piers.


<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "Come over here and say that, you walking tortilla chip."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I totally would but I am totally busy right now!"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Smarty-con Division rests for no-one!"

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "riiiight."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Yeah, you can't mess with a member of MSE."

<Decepticon> Americon gasps, and can be heard spitting out water. "You leave Frenzy or I'll waterboard you, too, Rampage! Somehow! And take it from me, it's not a fun experience!"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Yeah!! People know me, bitch!!"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I'm the Kevin Bacon of the Decepticon set!!"

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "haven't you heard, pipsqueak? Tigers LOVE water."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Hey Americon, you should..." A pause while newspaper rustles. "'Indefinitely detain' Rampage, eh heh."

<Decepticon> Dreadwind says, "Great, so while half of us argue over who's in charge the other half can sit and wait for the inevitable finality of termination, by these creatures."

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "You'll be the bacon in my BLT sandwich if you don't pipe down."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "That's pretty much the S.O.P., yeah."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "You can be the half that sits and waits cuz that's where your talents lie, OOOOH."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Hoooooo!"

<Decepticon> Americon says, "I will cover myself in laxatives so that eating me will result in horrible consequences for you!"

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "I should be so lucky."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Meanwhile.."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I..."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I..."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I'll kill you while you sleep, sucka!"

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Report is done and people are um. not around to question. And I have no CO right now. Im going to play."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Better keep one eye open!"


Sitting on the hood of her illegally acquired car which is in turn sitting in an old lot with weeds poking through cracks in the asphalt, Fuscienne swings legs off the edge of the vehicle. Various obscenities like "SPAIENT! Christ!" and "I don't have to listen to YOU!" escape her. Finally, with a hmmph, she snaps the cell phone off, and mutters, "The aliens only took it because it was such a fine piece of work."


DECEPTICON:

Message: 2/39: Report

Posted: Sun Mun 08

Author: Vortex

Ok today, I met with one of the people who have our bodies today. His name is Armatage Sloor and he goes by Inspector Goole here. Hes taken a human identity to talk to us. So I decided to give him a short..questioning.

I asked him what he wants from us he said he wishes to collect neurological feedback. Electricity that's in our brains. BAsically. He wants to create life. He is a zealot, a religous being that is part of an army that fights for something called "The Great Cause." They call themselves the Azrealean army. They want us to join them or die. They want us to surrender willingly. They said and I quote "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings" and we must decide for ourselves to join or die. THey want me to talk to Galvatron. And ask if I can give them the earth. Which means they'll talk to me again. They didnt give the location of the bodies.

But they did give bad news. 6 days. In 6 days they'll destroy the bodies if we don't surrender. The human bodies should already start to deteriorate. They'll kill us if we dont come along. I think they just want us to freely except them as our light and savior or whatever religious people do. He wanted me to contact Galvatron and ask him if he can have the earth. If so, he'd give us our bodies back. He also gave an ultimatum. In 6 days, he'd destroy both the human bodies and our mechanical ones if we didn't give in to demands. This alien is hiding out on earth as a human. I can give a detailed description of his appearance. He also seemed amicable for future meetings and questionings- Vortex, out.


<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Because if you deactivate both optics.."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "You ain't never gonna wake up!!"

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "Yayaya, gripping my pillow tight. Exit light yada yada yada."

<Decepticon> Dreadwind says, "My talents are far greater than your limited processes can possibly imagine, not that it's going to do us any good."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "I dunno, I can imagine quite a bit."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "And I don't care if Predaking hasta hop around on one leg!"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I know people!"

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "I'm his arm, dumbaft."

<Decepticon> Americon says, "Metallica! A good American band! I forgive you for your earlier slight against my fellow Casseticon."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Then I don't care if Predaking has to manipulate himself with his other hand!"

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Oooooh he just got TOLD."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I know people!!!"

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage snorts.


Dominic Duncan is walking along the bridge and can't HELP but overhear the latina's remarks. The last one is the one that catches his attention and he.....takes a closer look at the woman on top of the car. He's still pretty far away, but his walking speed is pretty fast for a guy his size and.....well..his eyes are good.


<Decepticon> Vortex says, "I wonder. Can humans Merge?"

<Decepticon> The Creepy One, Sunder says, "Yes, they can. Ew..."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "You think Ravage is the only one who can be all "into yer room I silently creep!?""

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "I so want to see that. Lemme gather about five of em."

<Decepticon> Give him some catnip Rampage says, "If into my room you silently creep, into my belleh you will get."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "You will wake up with all your arms and legs and your tail all chopped off."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "And then you'll be all, "OH NO I AM A TORSO!""

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "DO YOU KNOW WHAT I DO WITH TORSOS!?"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I shoot 'em out of my torso cannon!!!"

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Aren't all the people you know tapes, Frenzy? I mean apart from Soundwave."

<Decepticon> Americon says, "Uh... well... they don't really become more powerful when they merge. They just get diseases and bloating."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "So who'se up for gathering some humans to 'play' with?"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Don't you owe me like five galactic credits, Blitzwing!?"

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "No way, I totally paid you back that one time I saved you from being crushed by Motormaster at the Winter Formal when he was in that impromptu limbo competition and fell on the buffet."

<Decepticon> Americon says, "I will play with them! I will defeat them in duels and take their rare cards!"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Hmm."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "I guess that counted.."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Soundwave, did that count?"

<Decepticon> Soundwave *static*

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Oh nevermind. Amatures. No one understands a good time around here."

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Oh shush you freak."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Im going to go watch the Weather Channel. They showed this hurricane once.. Oh my. Primus."


Fuscienne de Lada slides off the metallic navy blue hood, pigtails flouncing as she pops the door open. Thoughtfully fingering the steering wheel, she looks at the sky and utters another round of curses to herself. "S'not like I can fly back, either." The double-taking Caucasian catches her attention, and jutting her chin out pugnaciously, she asks, "Yeah? Whatchoo lookin' at, gringo?"


Dominic Duncan shakes his head at the first remark. Time to test it. "From the sounds of it....a grounded flyer." he then looks her over....yes...obviously. "and I don't see a flight jacket. Someone clip your wings?"


DECEPTICON

Message: 2/40: Re: Vortex

Posted: Sun Jun 08

Author: Scrapper


TEXT ONLY

Good work, Vortex! After having a calm and open discussion with the rest of the troops, this is what our plan is:

1. We will tell this Inspector Goole individual that we are surrendering and we're all on board to join his stupid religion. Practice saying 'All hail the great cause' in front of the mirror if you have to. If you slip up and say 'all hail Galvatron' instead by mistake (as is understandable), just tell them that it's a synonym.

2. We will work to get the bodies back for our fellow Decepticons. Knowing the fleshlings and Autobots, they will never bow to their demands, and once we have our forms back...

3... we kill every alien and destroy their so-called great cause!

4. If anyone is able to contact Galvatron, Cyclonus, or Scourge, please do so!

5. Decepticon Central Intelligence has intercepted several transmissions from the Autobot broadband, suggesting that the recent illnesses that some of the humanized individuals is a result of something called 'pregnancy'. We refer you to this website on human reproduction so you all know what we're up against.

- The Constructicons


Oh? Another stray one? And one not necessarily well connected. There's a near audible *squint* of her fierce brown eyes as she scrunches up her face. "What's it to you if I am?" She braces one foot on the ground, door still open as she rests her right arm on the steering wheel.


Dominic Duncan tilts his head and nods....attitude was definitely the same. "Oh it means plenty to me. it means we have something in common." he says walking around the door and behind it. "I don't suppose Your wings happened to be Grey and gold would they?"


Fuscienne de Lada's glossy lips pucker as she refrains from comment, and raises a single index finger in classic 'hold on a sec' posture, before slamming the door shut, nearly catching the tall redhead's leg in the door. Turning quickly, she pulls the phone back out, and with benefit of the car frame muffling the conversation, gets the 411 on the fella outside.


<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "PSSSST."

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Sir?"

<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "Ey. Soundwave, Scrapper? You guys got trackers on us or something? Are there any other Decepticons turned hyooman in my general area? There's some tall redhead chatting me up about clipped wings and crap and I don't know if it's like an EDC officer trying to play attack of the body snatchers with me."


Dominic Duncan is quick enough to move out of the way of the door....and shrugs. He then starts to walks around the car and look at it.


<Decepticon> Soundwave says, "Unknown."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "No trackers I'm afraid."


And who's that driving down the street in a Harley-Davidson? Who's that All-American badass with the American flag bandanna? That's right, suckers, it's Keith Howard, super patriot and menace 2 society... in America.


<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Since I don't see anyone else on the frequency claiming to be this mystery redhead, I think your instincts are dead on."

<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "Time to mash the gas, the joker's walking circlin' my car."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "You get any trouble you lemme know, I'm off the Alaskan coast at the mo'."

<Decepticon> Americon says, "I see him now! I will run him over with my American motorcycle!"

<Decepticon> Not Rumble but Frenzy says, "Mo', huh?"

<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "Naw naw naw I'm about to."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Yeah, just for a li'l, you know."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Allright, whats your location or do you have things under control."

<Decepticon> Americon says, "I'll beat you to it!!!"

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "I would suggest letting sir do as she wishes."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Cause if you do.. I might just stay here. Any of you other humans feel a bit.. I dont know odd today?"

<Decepticon> The Creepy One, Sunder says, "I would observe, but currently I am, as the humans say, 'under the weather.' I should remember to blow up a certain cafe in San Fransisco when I get my body back. I think the cooks there do not know the meaning of 'food safe.'""

<Decepticon> Americon, over the sound of a roaring Harley Davidson engine, says, "What?"

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Im going to find a place indoors and have a lie down. I gotta be at my best condition if I need to question the Inspector again."

Keith Howard grins deliriously as he suddenly guns his engines. Somewhere down the street the other two humanized Cybertronians might be able to see him approaching on his bike. He's coming right for you!

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "You haven't stabbed yourself, have you? I find that's not a very good idea with these bodies."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Um you mean in the last hour?"

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Well, recently. Apparently, there is this 'tetanus' thing you can get."


What the guy is getting an eyeful of is a gloss navy blue 2008 Dodge Charger SRT8 with silver rally stripes on its hood, complete with blower and eco-terrorism 6.1 liter, hemi-injected 8 cylinder engine. It's quite a treat! However, as she hangs up the phone, Fuscienne twists around in the seat, and fixes the circling man with a sharp glare, she hmms. She's already had a few run ins with police over her driving habits, and many of those encounters have culminated in footchases through alleys, tasing, getting bitten by dogs, or maced. There had been some talk of Decepticons being taken in and being held by the EDC -- could this be an undercover operative. Deciding to not take any chances, she jams in the keys complete with a Japanese good luck cat charm and plastic Percheron into the ignition. The Charger leaps forward on its tires with a resonant, menacing rumble. Fuscienne slaps the drive into reverse, and with real wheels squealing, intends to back right over the offending party. Hopefully he's good a jumping. Oh hey, wasn't there a few Hells Angels starting to pull up? Motorcycles were nice, maybe she'd get one of those once she was tired with this thing. Oh right, guy she's trying to run over...


<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Its not from that. I dont think. I was fine yesterday."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "If ya want symptoms, I can let you know. But I also want to let you know I can and will do my job."


Dominic Duncan is definitely moving out of the way of both of them and shakes his head. he then Knocks on the window pretty hard. "UNLESS you want your Flight mode back Fusillade, You'll KNOCK IT OFF!"


<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Symptoms are probably better refered to someone with more a clue than wikipedia!"

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Well, that's not any of us then."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Right. WebMD it is."

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "If we ever get turned into trees, we're set. We've got a botantist in the ranks, y'know."


Damn. Missed. This was so much easier when she could just aim HERSELF at people. Fuscienne barely misses the toes of the leaping pest, but the yelling and knocking finally get through. Face still screwed up in a tiny, fierce moue, she halts the car. An electronic whine from the driver's side window rolling down, before she leans out on one elbow, and barks out and up at him, "OKAY, if you wanna play like that... Who's gonna get it back for me, huh? YOU?"


Keith Howard pops a wheelie, and does something utterly nuts. Aiming his bike at another car, he ramps off of it and sends his motorbike and himself flying at the weird red-headed guy. "Prepare to meet your doom, Frenchie! In Ameri--" However, mid-flight, Keith's hands lose their grip on the bike and he is hurtling through the air without straight at that Duncan character! "OH SH--"


Jetfire succeeds in grasping Keith Howard, throwing him off-balance.


<Decepticon> Soundwave says, "Autobots reporting Sky Lynx and Lee-zard under effects of illness."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Everyone is now under orders to pray for Sky Lynx's death."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Omega Supreme, too."

<Decepticon> Geist says, "What? And deprive us of our long fought for trophy?"


Dominic Duncan turns his head and braces himself to catch Keith... "and from the way you're acting...I believe you are Americon." he then sets him down and turns back to Fuscienne. "Yes....me." he then leans inside the car to speak only to her.


<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "I'll take the easy win any day in this case, Geist."

<Decepticon> The Creepy One, Sunder says, "If I would pray for Sky Lynx's death, I would pray that it be at my own talons."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "The rest of these heathens are talking nonsense, I'll pray with you, Scrapper."

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Megatron, who art in Galvatron, please deliver us Sky Lynx and Omega Supreme's deaths, amen."


Jetfire mutters to Fusillade, "... and... knowledge... and... back to..."

Jetfire whispers "Unless you don't remember a red and white Autobot sharing knowledge with you and helping you get back to Trypticon a few months ago."


Keith Howard is shocked as he comes to an amazingly smooth landing in Duncan's arms. "Woah! I was going over 50! How did you catch me without phsyical harm!? You must be very strong, and American!" Then, as Duncan drops him, he falls over and yells, just as Duncan is speaking, "ARRRRRRGH!"


<Decepticon> Vortex says, "I know he's not here so I figure I'd say a prayer for Swindle. Allmighty dollar who aret in my swiss bank account..."

<Decepticon> Scrapper is respectfully silent.

<Decepticon> Americon says, "ARRRGH!"

<Decepticon> Soundwave says, "Illness likely to affect all humanized Cybertronians."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "All... affected humanized... uh oh."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Great..."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "We better steal us a medical team."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing just has a moment of silence in which he fervently wishes that Sky Lynx and Omega Supreme would drop dead of cholera or ebola or something.


Well, having someone lean in over her certainly gets a reaction from the Latina. Eyes go wide, and with whipcrack precision, she snaps out a switchblade from somewhere around her waist, and jabs it up so that the tip is pressing against the man's neck. "Aight, close enough


<Decepticon> Vortex says, "that explains why my midsection feels. Utoh. I need to put down the cell phone. NOW."

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Raid on Johns Hopkins?"

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Who?"

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Wiki it!"

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "<disconnects>"

<Decepticon> Scrapper tap tap taps.

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Fortunately I already made my lunchbox into a human-carrying case for safe human-capturing."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "I poked holes in it and padded it and everything."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Sure, that works for me."


Well, having someone lean in over her certainly gets a reaction from the Latina. Eyes go wide, and with whipcrack precision, she snaps out a switchblade from somewhere around her waist, and jabs it up so that the tip is pressing against the man's neck. "Aight, close enough playboy." But then, as the words are murmured, she gives a faint 'oh' to herself. "Well if anyone COULD, I guess it'd be YOU... and Americon? Izzat him?" She eases off on the weapon, trying to peer over Duncan's shoulder to see Keith. "So what name did you pick? Something like Geoffrey?"


Keith Howard raises a thumb from the ground. "I am known as Keith Howard, a very American name! Two very American names, that is, fused together into an all-powerful whole! And I steal things, so sometimes I call myself..." He sits up dramatically. "BANDIT KEITH."

"Because Bandits steal," he explains.


Fuscienne de Lada jams a finger out of the car around Jetfire. "HEY! You take that back about Bandit RIGHT NOW!"


Jetfire succeeds in grasping Fuscienne de Lada, throwing her off-balance.


Dominic Duncan grabs onto Fusi's shirt to stop her. "Stop this. It'll get us nowhere if we keep screaming at each other." HE then turns to Americon. "Americon....Find Galvatron. I want to speak to him......and....if he doesn't want to...tell him his life-spark is in danger." No...he's not kidding. and no...he hasn't let go of Fusi's shirt.....but he's definitely not a threat to her either.....more like he doesn't want her to leave....yet.

Fuscienne de Lada throws a punch!


Keith Howard brushes himself off as he stands up. "I am very sorry to insult this Bandit character for his rampant theft and thuggery!" Then, as Duncan gets all grabby grabby, Americon growls, "HEY! We were having a pleasant conversation! Release the young lady, or prepare to DUEL!" He reaches into his jacket slowly...


Fuscienne de Lada continues squirming and grousing. "HEY! Stop that, jerkface! I'm closer to your size now, I have a better chance of beating you up!!" The slapflighting doesn't seem to be doing any good, and eventually she scowls up to him. "Yeah the stupid aliens told Vortex they wanted to talk to Galvatron too. He's in pretty high demand these days. Unless you already HAVE something in the works on how to get us back, I swear it..." She puffs out her cheeks slightly.


Dominic Duncan is easily able to dodge Fusi's slaps...even without looking at her. "Unless you wish to die as well, Americon.....do what I said. He'll want to hear what I have so far" he then looks to Fusi....and finally releases her. "Of course I have something in the works....or I wouldn't be telling you about this. Besides....You're too cute to let die." He then blinks a couple of times. "Where in primus did that come from?"


Keith Howard smirks snarkily. "I didn't even hear what you said, so I guess I will die! But I am proud to die as a true American, so take that, Frenchie!" Then, he finally pulls something out of his jacket, and it's... a deck of cards!? "Draw your pathetic cards now, you silly little man! It's time to duel!"


"From the meatflaps in your FACE," Fuscienne says with all the grace of first grader in the middle of a recess brawl. "Lemme hear it FIRST, then, as much as you've teased me about the stupid Academe in Crystal City, you should know that I can follow a fair amount of... Wait, die? Was he serious about that?" And then she peers awkwardly at Americon. "Err, um, this guy might actually be able to do something about us being stuck like this, Americon."

Fuscienne de Lada adds petulantly in afterthought to Americon, "And Bandit doesn't steal stuff!"


<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Down here it ain't! I've got Grimlock trying to stop us from nabbing human mechanics to fix our humans!"

<Decepticon> Astrotrain says, "To fix our hu...oh. Right."

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Quick. Can someone name me a random human specialist doctor?"

<Decepticon> Astrotrain says, "Oh yeah sure lemme check my book."

<Decepticon> Astrotrain says, "NOT!"

<Decepticon> Vortex says, "Astrotrain has a book. Snicker."


Keith Howard scowls back at her. "But he's called Bandit! Stealing is what bandits do! Ergo, he steals!" He leans forward, removing his glasses and putting on a deadly serious look. "How do you know he hasn't stolen from YOU!?"

<Decepticon> The Creepy One, Sunder says, "You know, this substance the humans use to treat disorders of their fuel tank...looks a lot like energon. Tastes sweeter."


Dominic Duncan sighs. "Fine. He then looks to Fusillade. "Can you take me to Autobot City? Then help me meet with Galvatron?" He's very serious apparently. "And....can you PLEASE help me with this, Fusillade? We've already got a pair of Autobots that are sick. Who's next? You? Me? I'd LIKE to figure this out before everyone drops dead....including us."


<Decepticon> Vortex says, "You should drink it till its all gone. I gotta go work.."


A driverless but otherwise run of the mill pick up truck drives at a nearly reckless pace, clearly searching for...something.


Keith Howard considers Duncan's words. "Well, today I did have to spend about an hour in the bathroom, with, uh, 'problems,' let's just say. It was really unsavory!"


"Only thing he's stolen is my heart, ha ha!" Fuscienne jests back, before shaking her head. "Naw, that's just something I heard on a television show. I think the name isrelated to what AMERICAN pilots -- yeah yeah this is where YOU come in -- gave to Russian jets during the Cold War. And you DO know that Bandit turns into an Su-47 Berkut, RIGHT?" At Jetfire's insistance, she mmms. "Autobot City.... nope, don't think I'm gonna do THAT one, what do I have STUPID written on my forehead here, huh?" She flashes a grin at him despite herself though, and bounces in her seat. "Tell you what, though, if you're good we can stay here and I can get Galvatron to come out here and talk to you first." She jiggles the cell phone in her hand, before glancing over at Keith. "What, like falling apart? I thought it look a while for that to happen to hyoomans." She's currently half in, half out of the driver's seat of her favorite stolen car.


The driverless pickup truck gets stuck at a standstill behind the stolen car and the woman hanging half out of it. The turn signal is turned on, in hopes of getting out from behind the car and moving again.


Keith Howard nods. "Yes, he's Russian, which merely confirms his lack of integrity and character!" If he has any idea that's treading on thin ice with Fuscienne, he gives no sign of it. "And your example of American pilots calling their Communist foes Bandits just proves my point! Bandits are BAD. Therefore, they must be shot down!... well, if... Galvatron orders it I guess. I hope." Then, about the 'falling apart' comment he replies, "Well, eating burritos may accelerate the process, I am not sure!"


The slow tick tick tick of the turn signal finally gets noticed by Fuscienne, who glances over her shoulder and waves on the vehicle. However, at Americon's continued prattle about one of the (many) beloved Russian jets that fill the ranks of Decepticon Aerospace, she salutes him. With one finger. It looks a bit like this:


Keith Howard, upon being shown the bird, removes his glasses as he wipes away tears... of joy. "You make this American proud, ma'am. God bless you."


Dominic Duncan sighs quietly. "I'm not saying you need to go IN to Autobot city....just drop me off. they don't know what you look like and I have no intention of telling them if you don't want." He then thinks for a second. "I do need a bit of blood though....from both of you." he says with a sigh. "Too much stupidity on the airwaves."


The driverless pickup truck honks one short 'meep' at the woman and the stolen car, hoping she'll get out of the way. There is NO way he's going to


"Sorry I couldn't make it star-spangled for you." Fuscienne smirks, before tilting her head to the side as she anticipates his response. "Well not YET they don't, I guess. But I'm sayin' I could get Galvatron out here now if you wanted. And blood?" She glances down at her arms, and hmms. But she gets interrupted by the honking, and leans out the car, boot grinding the weeds popping up in the lot's cracks and asphalt. "EY! There's enough road for all of us! I'm parked! GO around already!"


<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "Hey, Galvatron? Got an Autobot scientist type that might be on to something. He's stuck in human body too. Wanna meet up with him?"


Keith Howard looks hopeful for a moment. "You can make it star-spangled, too!?" Then, Jet-human informs of his desire for his blood. "WHAT!?" Keith yells, balling up his fists and getting into a boxing stance. "You want my blood?! It'll be over my dead body! Then you can have all the blood you want!" Then he yells at the truck, "Don't interrupt me while I'm rambling angrily!"


Finally, the driverless truck starts to go around the car as the woman leans out and yells at him really rudely. He's just too freaked out about Sky Lynx and Lee-Zard possibly dying and needing to find Jetfire and get him back to Metroplex.


Dominic Duncan shakes his head. "We can come back here, Fusillade. I need to get to Autobot City fairly quickly....and away from this nutjob." He jerks his thumb towards Keith. "help me and I'll make SURE you know about my plans to get our bodies back. Don't....and you'll be one of the LAST to know!"


<Decepticon> Cyclonus says, "The Overlord wants to know: Which one?"


All of the comm chatter must be making him crack.


The truck abruptly stops with a squeak of its brakes next to Fusillade and her car. A voice emits from the vehicle, "Jetfire, sir?"


<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "Uh... Jetfire. But I think an Autobot is trying to retrieve him."


Dominic Duncan looks up. "That you Bitbucket?"


Bitbucket says, "Yes, sir! I've been trying to find you!"


<Decepticon> Americon says, "I will destroy him!"

<Decepticon> Cyclonus says, "We'll meet him in a place of OUR MASTER'S choosing. The Autobots are NOT to be trusted. Name for him a location away from the eyes of the Autobots and we will consider it."


Dominic Duncan says, "Why? So Xenophobic Briar can keep saying he knows more than me? He can go jump in a black hole."


"Whoa whoa whoa, what's going on here?!" Fuscienne demands. "You two know each other? And what's going on with the other Autobots? Are they like, DEAD dead?"


Bitbucket says, "Sir, Miss Andi sent me to get you and the data that you're needin to get to her. We've got to hurry, sir, Sky Lynx was leaking something RED!"


<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Cyclonus, er, does mighty Galvatron approve of the steps that we've taken so far?"


"Oh and he says he can meet now yeah but it needs to be a neutral spot. Without any metal Autobots around." Fuscienne holds her hand over the phone's mouthpiece and SCOWLS at the vehicle for intervening. She's gone from trying to run over him to tolerating being pawed, it must be magic.


Keith Howard scowls at Duncan. "That's cool! We'll just steal the cure or whatever it is from you! Now excuse me while I destroy this Autobot!" Walking up to Bitbucket, Americon punches the truck on his hood with all his might... and ends up hopping around, yelling and grabbing his injured hand. "Arrrgh!"


<Decepticon> Cyclonus says, "He has expressed no dissatisfaction to ME. I do not ask such things of our Master. When he wishes me to know his mind he will make it clear to me. Until them I am content in my ignorance."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "That's good enough for me."


Dominic Duncan winces. "it's already started." he looks to Fusillade. "Come with me and I'll explain on the way. Then I'll SHOW you on one of the datapads I can get from there. THEN we'll go to a neutral spot and meet with him." and he starts climbing into Bitbucket. "Last chance. trust me or not....I'm leaving now."


The driverless truck actually jumps a bit on its tires as the crazy man punches its hood. "OW!" Surprisingly, Keith's punch DID manage to leave a dent, as if this Autobot were a normal vehicle instead of an armored version.


Fusillade succeeds in grasping Dominic Duncan, throwing it off-balance.


A vengeful look crosses Fuscienne's face. "And why can't you just go ahead and email or text it or whatever to me while you're driving back in your friend, huh?!" She finally stands, slamming the door shut behind her as she trounces after him. "I guess you Autobots AREN'T made out of sterner stuff, if you're having THAT bad of problems. We've only had a few minor inconveniences so far that I've known!" She keeps goading him, talking and walking faster, until he is nearly completely enclosed in the vehicle. At that point, she leaps at him, and with eyes slightly crossed, proceeds to... BITE him on the shoulder. Regardless of the outcome, she'll likely be left in Bitbucket's unapped-for dust, yelling out reminders to meet later and to really have his all of his SCIENCE together for REAL this time!


Keith Howard hops around some more, but takes some time out to cheer for the perhaps equally crazy Latina. "Hurray! That is a true American woman! Violent to the core! Ow, my hand... I forgot it wasn't made of metal!"


Jetfire succeeds in grasping Fuscienne de Lada, throwing her off-balance.


Dominic Duncan despite getting bitten, yoinks Fusi into the truck with him. "Drive BB!" And he tries to hold her down until they get near autobot city.


<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Scrapper, sir! Cover me! Vortex is a sick, but we almost have this!"

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "This is so not my day."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Alright, Astrotrain, kill Grimlock."

<Decepticon> Astrotrain says, "..."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "I'm gong to cover Catechism and Vortex. Fury, kill Grimlock also."

<Decepticon> Astrotrain says, "F*BLEEP* you too Scrapper!"

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Hey I had to make an executive decision here!"

<Decepticon> Americon says, "Meanwhile, I will kill this Autobot!"

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "It's just as hard on me as it is on you!"


Keith Howard doesn't let them leave that easily, though, as he launches into a flurry of kicks on the Autobot truck. "Kidnapping an American!? NOT IN MY COUNTRY, BUSTER! Feel the wrath of my boots, you monster!"


<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "Just remember, if we don't get these doctors and Lord Galvatron dies of chicken pox or something, he's totally going to come back to life and kill you."


Cue the crazy traffic montage music! There's going to be a prodigious amount of screaming, kicking, and cursing -- and all this even after he manages to get the weapon out of her hands.


<Decepticon> Mother Goose Fusillade says, "GAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHh"

<Decepticon> Americon says, "NOOOOO! Those damn Autobots kidnapped Fuschian Lade, or whatever she calls herself as a human!"

<Decepticon> Loser Catechism says, "...sir!"

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Slaggit! Leading the Decepticons is impossibly hard!"


The truck flees from the scary duo of Yelling Lady and Punching Man, taking Jetfire back to Autobot City as fast as traffic laws allow.


<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Let me know as soon as you're ready for lift off, Catechism."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "As soon as we're clear, Astrotrain and Fury, I recommend getting out of here."

<Decepticon> Blitzwing says, "Man, Grimlock is heavy."

<Decepticon> Scrapper says, "Stay if you want, but if Grimlock or Cosmos crush you with their bulk don't blame us!"

<Decepticon> Fury says, "This overweight glob of grease is no threat to ME."


Keith Howard shakes his fist at the long-departed Autobot truck. "Dammmmnnnn youuuuu!"


<Decepticon> Dreadwind says, "That's what they all say before they come running, crying for repairs."


There's plenty of lunging for the door, but most of the dives are firmly intercepted. Ultimately, Fuscienne finally sulks in the passenger seat, sending looks that could kill over to Duncan. "Okay, so spill it. Whatcha got so far?" Blitzwing (BW) pages: I know it was kind of sudden! [Hardcode Hack Helper <HHH>:] Jetfire grumbles as he hops out....and promptly gets back into the truck. "OK. Here's what we've got so far is this. All of these bodies...including yours I imagine....which is a pity cuz you really have a nice one there.....have one DNA genome in common. Now the DNA sequence is supposed to be unique in all aspects...or if there's genomes in common...they're supposed to be in different areas. We all have one in common....on the fourth rung, from the bottom on the left side."


Keith Howard is still shaking his fist and yelling.

Keith Howard then gets an idea. He looks back at his motorcycle, which is on top of a Japanese motorcyle. The latter is in little pieces, whilst the Harley appears to be (mostly) fine. "HA! That's for Pearl Harbor, Japan!" Propping the motorcycle up, he hops back onto the seat and tears off.


There's a bewildered glance down at herself from Fuscienne, before she smirks a bit at Duncan. "Finally got bored with the mindgames? Smelt, it MUST be serious then." She pauses, listening, brow furrowed as she nods. "Uh... huh? So there's a section that's the same for all of us, okay..." She draws out her syllables as if not quite fully sure if her summary was correct.


Jetfire sighs. "no mind games Fusillade. All of this is true. Simply put....take a single engine plane....and take off it's wings and turn off it's engine. smack. It's gonna crash. These guys apparently have the means to do that to every single one of us because of that one dna tag we have. Sky Lynx was the first to go down...and I imagine it's the biggest first...then it works it's way down the line until the smallest of us are hit too."


"Hold on, Fusa Lynne!" Keith Howard cries as he pushes his bike to the limit, swerving dangerous in between cars and even onto sidewalks. "I'll save you!"


It's true, though: the variable nucleotide tandem repeat (VNTR) sequences located at the end of the 4th chromosome were vulnerable to being manipulated. If the telomere buffer zone provided by their repeated gibberish was removed, it could expose important genes to potential harm -- and in this case, the process appeared to be accelerated. Such gems include: Fletcher factor - a clotting defect, the coding sequence for Coagulation Factor XI - the combined lack of both very easily leading the affected Cybertronians to bleed out in a spectacular manner that would make hemopheliac look like a garden variety cold. Type I Parkinson's Disease, alcoholism, muscular dystrophy, melanoma growth stimulation, acute lymphocytic leukemia, hip dysplasia, kidney malfunction in the form of renal tubular acidosis and Type II Polycystic Kidney Disease, Severe Combined Immunodeficiency, and oddly enough even the presence of red hair color could potentially be triggered by this meddling.

Fuscienne would likely have no way to fathom the mechanics of the ticking time bomb waiting within. She bites her lower lip, and nods solemnly to Jetfire. "Go down in what way? You were gone for a little while. And largest first?" She stammers a bit, glancing over Jetfire's human form briefly. "Alt mode or robot mode? Or combined?" She knows damned well that if it's related to overall size, he and she would be having problems very very soon. Her stomach gurgles, and she clutches at it -- could it just be nerves? "And how... can we reverse it? Get ourselves back in our bodies? Is there a quick solution? Should we try to find them and just overthrow them ourselves? Why can't we just download ourselves into a new body like that Guiltor freaktard that was giving us trouble a while ago?" She glances up at the shouting and yelling in the distance as she pries herself out of the truck, and scuffs her boot on the ground.


Jetfire slides his way out of the truck as well and sighs. "Tallest human forms first. More body to maintain." he says softly and looks at himself. "And as you can see....I'm taller than you." he then sighs quietly and....reaches out to feel Fusillade's stomach. yup he's getting bold, but this is serious. "We need to get our bodies back. That's why I need to talk to Galvatron. My body has a Homing beacon on it....and apparently these....things don't know about it. They're in Subspace." And he puts his finger on his free hand up to her lips to shush her. "Don't say anything to anyone. apparently they're in cloned bodies too."


Keith Howard says, "You disgusting humie-phile!" screams Keith Howard as he roars in via his motorcycle. "Prepare to meet your end.. IN AMER--" Then, the front wheel of his bike hits a rock and he goes catapulting off of it into the air. "OH SH--" THWAM! He lands in the back of truck. "I'm ok!" he says, holding up a thumb.


"Then Fulcrum's gonna really be in trouble! So will Ga--" Fuscienne flinches a bit at the contact, and smarts off, "Oh yeah homing beacons like the one you stuck in me during that one time on Neocron, Shockwave and Symphony chewed me out REAL good for THAT stunt, mister. You know, I really should go ahead and knock your block off now while I have the chance for tha-" He quiets her, and she clicks teeth on the air in the direction of his finger before she ducks aside of the rampaging cycle, leaving cool air in her wake. "But yeah, like I said, I could get you that meeting. How about my mountain?" She grins wide, and then darts off, yelling at Americon to come along.


Jetfire calls back. "we'll see about your mountain when this is over, Fusi."


--End--

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