Summary: At a Decepticon station deep in space, an old enemy returns.
Inside the station, the once pristine and worklike environment has been turned black and ruined, machinery broken and sparking, the bodies of scientists lying about, walls etched with deep scorchmarks. Something happened here. Something bad.
Earlier, the message had been sent from the Decepticon station Sunlab 2 to Cyclonus. This was the location where Galvatron's humanized body was being kept whilst the scientists tried to rescue his true form from Oord space. Perhaps Cyclonus's own unique Unicronian makup could help them track it down?
But once at the station, the place looks pretty... wrecked
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> stomps into view. "Somebody call for a FUELER?!" He snorts loudly. He looks around, for the first time taking in the scene, then drops his voice to a medium snort. "Uh...did somebody call for fuel?"
Because this MUSH is drawn by Korean children with no story editors, Cyclonus's jet form is actually capable of accomodating all of his passengers: Ramjet, Soundwave, Tantrum, Ransack, and Venom -- with Frenzy absent, other, more figurative redshirts must be used. He docks at Sunlab-2, grimly stating, "I'm detecting damage to the station's power supply. If this is the work of those accursed... 'Wreckers,' you are to terminate on sight."
"Hnnh. I see why Galvatron keeps you at his side so frequently, Lord Cyclonus." Ramjet thinks aloud as he climbs out. "You are bigger on the inside than on the outside! Such convenience." He subsequently glances to the side, as if to clue everyone else in on the double entendre there. Shaking his coned head, he gives Tantrum a wary glance and a clenched-fist shake. "You've said that five times on the flight over. I thought the silence would've given you some clue, Predacon!"
The hanger bay itself is pretty wrecked. Some of the survey ships and supply shuttles are smashed beyond repair, most of them broken and smoking, charred holes in the engine blocks, preventing them from escaping. The emergency lighting is still active in this area, casting everything in a red glow, illuminating the bodies of several scientists and guards that lie on the floor, dead, heads and limbs missing. And something from inside the station seems to be blocking any and all radio transmissions
Soundwave can be a very small passenger, indeed! His gaze sweeps left and right over the scorched walls and bodies as he steps out of Cyc.. er, the spaceship. Hands free, but shoulder cannon tracking with his gaze. "Scanning.." he emits, the voice echoing off the walls.
Once his load is emptied, Ransack and Venom scurrying out and waving their guns around to secure the perimeter like a good pair of inconsequential soldiers, Cyclonus transforms. "Tesseract technology," he notes. "One of the many blessings of Unicron." He brushes some space dust off of his horned helmet and looks around. "If the power supply is indeed damaged, we will need a fueler, yes, Tantrum. Hh." Cyclonus walks over to a loosened head and picks it off a corpse's torso with a loud 'pop' of cables snapping. He holds the severed, damaged head at arm level and looks into its face. "A shame," he notes, and casually throws the head over his shoulder.
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> trots out into the hangar bay, too slow to be a stampede, but faster than a simple walk. "SHUT UP!" He grunts back to Ramjet. "I forget things sometimes, okay?!" He looks around, then lowers his snout and sniffs loudly at one of the dead bodies. After a while he straightens up his neck. "He's dead!" he reports.
Returning to a more serious tone, Ramjet is made stern by his initial inspection of the hangar bay. The torso-heaps of the guard catch his interest, and with arm-rifle held out in caution, he slowly approaches one. "Hnnh.." Ramjet murmurs in disgust. He leans close and gives one of the torso heaps a nudge with the tip of his foot. ".. they're all dead," he complements Tantrum's observations. "Such intention. What happened here?"
"You're the closest thing we have to a ballistics expert, Ramjet," Cyclonus notes, a bit sadly. "So why don't you tell me what /you/ think might cause this kind of damage."
Soundwave breaks out the big guns. In his hand he has a Transformer-sized whosiwhatsit that looks like the EKG meter from Ghostbusters. The cartoon, not the movie. Left and right, right and left.
Ramjet scowls at Cyclonus. This crime-scene is more up Dirge's alley -- it gives him the creeps! "I'll take a closer look, Lord Cyclonus," he reports with a faint disgusted edge to his voice. Still holding his arm straight, the mounted rifle held in cautious aim at the body, Ramjet leans in to take a closer observation. "Hnnh..." He murmurs aloud.
Most of the dead are suffering from plasma burns, or damage caused from what could only be a pair of hands tearing them in half. Others look to be shot up from standard issue blasters, as if some bizarre civil war had taken place on the station. What madness could have gripped these poor scientists?
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> SNRTS! "Who cares what did it? I just wanna know if it's still here. With all this FUELING, I haven't had a chance to really smack somebody in weeks!!" He trots over for the door to the hangar bay, eager to get to the rest of the station.
"Wounds inflicted by those present. Cause: unknown. Conjecture: SPACE MADNESS." Okay, so Soundwave doesn't say 'space madness' in all caps, he says it all normal. You know, like the giant Mr. No Personality he is.
Ramjet turns his head back to report to Cyclonus, "Looks like standard armaments, Lord Cyclonus. Except.. when you look up close. These tears.. they're far from a precise shot from any weapon. These men look like they were torn apart, and shot up. Hnnh. Close quarters. Undisciplined effort. They probably shot themselves as something tore them in half."
Soundwave stops and looks at Ramjet, then reaches down to lift a corpse up by the face, to closely inspect the body.
Ramjet looks unsettled as Soundwave uses a hands-on approach to an autopsy. Why is he always surrounded by freaks!?
Ransack moves to accompany Tantrum, gun held out at the ready. "We'll take a deeper look, Cyclonus," Ransack says. "Trust me -- nothing can defeat the combination of an Insecticon and a Predacon."
Cyclonus rolls his robot eyes, which can't really be seen because they have no features, pupils, or even any visible way of moving autonomously. "Venom -- bring that one over here -- no -- no, stop eating -- I said /STOP/ eating it. /THAT/ one with the crater for a shoulder."
As Soundwave and Ramjet report, Cyclonus kneels, doing his own CSI bit. "There hasn't been an outbreak of Space Madness on record in four million years, Soundwave," he grouses.
As the various characters lean over the bodies... one of the inner doors bursts open and into the hangar area sweeps a platoon of damaged guards, weapons at the ready and headed up by a green seeker scientist. All the guards point their guns at the new arrivals fanning out, but silent.
"HAIL MEGATRON!" the scientist announces, without emotion
Cyclonus stands up, snapping off the dark-tinted science visor he had surreptitiously put on, and fires his oxidating laser directly at the man in the lead.
Soundwave spins, chucking the body at the guards and drawing his missile launcher out of subspace, aiming it at them. "CEASE HOSTILE ACTION," reverberates from the very walls.
On reflex, Ramjet swings up his rifles to greet the platoon of guards. Fingers clench into his palms, close to setting off internal triggers to light them all ablazed when he relents at seeing the scientist. "Whoa, Lord Cyclonus! It's one of our men!" Ramjet shouts in alarm as Cyclonus takes immediate, lethal action.
Venom, meanwhile, dives behind a pile of bodies for cover, poking his funny head and his gun out from his foxhole of death.
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> snorts two small trails of steam from his nostrils and charges the next scientist after the one that Cyclonus shot. He slams his horns around the poor tech's abdomen (luckily their span is enough to close around the tech's midsection like pincers), and then lifts the hapless gumby up like a rodeo clown and tosses him to the ground. He spins around, ready to stomp or gore or melt him - Tantrum himself rarely knows which is coming, until it happens - but then stops at Soundwave's order. "Huh?!"
As Cyclonus shoots the scientist, the poor seeker explodes into a pyrotechnic display of diodes and sparks, the guards starting to shoot back until... they too stop as Soundwave speaks. The chief guard, a golden tank walks up to Cyclonus and gives him a quick salute, kicking the body of the scientist. "Heh, you had us going for a while. Good to see you here sir"
Ramjet keeps his rifles raised, despite the salute the Chief Guard gives Cyclonus. "....." He stares silently, sliding his suspicious attention from the haggard guard to Cyclonus, then to the dead scientist. Ramjet's brow crinkles as thoughts struggle through his simplistic cranial circuits. Discomforting emptiness tugs at his energo-processor. Something is wrong, Ramjet decides.
Cyclonus stares down the chief guard, lowering his rifle. "I do not like to be threatened on my own station, Goldpaver," the Decepticon lord, bon vivant, saboteur, ponce, et al. states, flatly and with a tight, controlled menace. "I would not have hesitated to crush your motley little bunch with a /sweep/ of my mighty hand." Cyclonus demonstrates this by picking the tank up by the throat. "I believe your sitrep was due about a minute ago."
Soundwave dismisses his weapon, then strides forward into the array of guards, bringing his scanning equipment to bear on them.
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> looks up at the chief guard, then looks over at Cyclonus and the other Decepticons he came with, then down at the Gumbycon he's still holding down on the ground with one metal hoof. Tantrum jabs his horns forward a few inches, almost like he's gonna gore the guy anyway, but stops himself then finally lets the tech up. "FINE! But next time we shoot first and ask questions later, I wanna go first!!" He moves over to the side of the Gumby contingent, where one quick charge will take him into their midst in case anyone changes their mind about talking.
Ramjet scoffs at Tantrum, "Yeah, you can go first all you like."
Goldpaver chokes slightly as he is lifted by the throat, dangling in the air as even his bulky mass is easily held aloft by Cyclonus. "Nnn!" he chokes, dropping his weapon. "The lightbringer was cast down into the pit!" he croaks, his optics wide. "Cast into the darkness where he lay, stripped and naked but he did not weep or wail or gnash his teeth, but tore himself from that dark place. I-its all in the B-black Book of P-Primus!" He's looking a bit more panicy at this stage, but a cursory mental scan would indicate only slight insanity, which for a Decepticon warrior is pretty normal
Soundwave scans and scans and scans some more. "Inconclusive. Moving to secure landing site." He ejects Laserbeak and Buzzsaw as he walks, and they begin setting up a security perimeter in the landing bay.
"Sounds like something Fulcrum'd spout," Ramjet grumbles. The religious tracts make his cone ache.
"The Black Book of Primus." Cyclonus repeats those words, slowly, his voice growing even more gravelly as his grip tightens a bit. "Firstly, the Black Book of Primus is a myth. /Secondly/, it is a myth so /intensely classified/ that your even /mentioning/ it is grounds for execution. So tell me. How do you, Goldpaver, know about the Black Book of Primus." Cyclonus seems oblivious to the rest of the room, his focus squarely on this topic.
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> moves over to stand next to Ramjet. "Yeah...I should've known. This is gonna get all mystical and confusing." He snorts. "Pretty soon you'll be begging me to shoot you. Maybe that's what happened to those guys out in the hangar."
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> nods at Cyclonus. "See what I mean? Every time somebody opens their mouth about Primus, somebody else's gotta put in their two energon chips. It's worse than talking about the Olympics!"
Ramjet sneers at Tantrum. "Shouldn't you be busy wrestling Thrust?" He says venomously, referring to the portrait hanging in the Wing n' Thruster that has been converted into a dartboard.
Blot lifts a hairy slimy ape arm at Tantrum "Maybe soon Blot will be asking you to shoot Blot, Huh?" He demands challengingly, looking a little confused, but obviously not letting that disrupt his badass poise.
Goldpaver painfully tilts his head to Tantrum. "No... they... they didn't understand. They were confused and scared and they had to die. They did not believe in Him." He then turns to Cyclonus again, still in his grasp. "I.. I have always known of the book sir. But... but that isn't important. What is, is that... He has called you..."
"DAMN YOUR OPTICS, GOLDPAVER," Cyclonus suddenly barks, a rare instance of the Decepticon underboss completely losing his cool, letting a choked, sawed-off rage spew to the surface: "IF YOU WILL NOT BEGIN SPEAKING /REASON/ I WILL BE FORCED TO RENDER YOU JUST AS NON-EXISTANT AS THAT ACCURSED /BOOK/!"
Blot says, "Who has called us? Chef Boyardee! Yeah Blot not want to miss him!" He chuckles cockil while rubbing his monstrous belly. "Maybe stupid goldtank not so stupid?" He says quietly underneath Cyclonus' outburst conveniently enabling him to ignore it."
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> hasn't seen any such poster. "Don't know what you're talking about!" He complains to Ramjet. Then he looks at Goldpaver again. "Wait a second...you're saying YOU killed 'em?" He paws at the ground, sizing up the herd of gumbys and techs like a set of billiard balls he's about to break. Looks like maybe he'll get his action after all. "Space madness is right! Let's scrap em!"
"No! Nononono!" Goldpaver cries, still writhing in Cyclonus's grasp. "Do you not understand? He lives and we obey! He summons and you come! And soon... soon we will all see the light, and YES I had them killed!" The tank makes a pathetic mewling sound as his optics stutter from Cyclonus's rough handling of him
Ramjet rises to his feet and makes his way to Cyclonus and Goldpaver. Being the straightman of Aerospace's premiere three-man squadron, he is no stranger to playing the "good cop" to Dirge's "creepy motherfucker" in order to force wayward jets into submission. "Better answer Lord Cyclonus, Goldpaver! He once scrapped an entire wing because they saluted him three astro-seconds too late."
SOME TIME AGO
Cyclonus really did do that.
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> moves around to the back of the group of space-mad Gumbies this time. "WHO lives? WHO are you talking about? It's not Unicron, is it?" By this time he's muttering, mostly talking to himself. "It better not be Unicron. Not AGAIN..."
Cyclonus holds Goldpaver, a bulky golden tank of a guardsman, in the air by his throat. The Decepticon Lord seems agitated -- visibly angry, an expression that barely ever crosses his face. "You speak not only /treason/ but /madness/," Cyclonus says, his forearm -- the one holding Goldpaver up -- visibly shaking a bit, as if a servo momentarily failed. "I can only presume you are indeed infected with Space Madness, Goldpaver. I will now administer the only known cure, as you are no longer of use to the Decepticons. Farewell." Cylonus points his rifle at Goldpaver's chest -- and fires directly through the robot, where his laser core would sit.
Ramjet leans close to Cyclonus and advises, "You keep fraggin' the survivors and we'll never find out what happened here. Not, uh, that I have a problem with that or anything, sir."
Goldpaver explodes as Cyclonus executes him, his golden frame greying as his lasercore shatters, the shards falling through the air like dying snowflakes as his body slumps. And then there is the sound os silence as the smoke coalesces, and the door behind them slides open.
And Tantrum gets an answer. "I LIVE!" comes a voice, croaking, crackling, unrecognisable, coming from the darkness within
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> bellows in rage and frustration! (and is that fear?!...No wait, it's just eagerness. Sometimes when Tantrum bellows 'eager' it comes out sounding like 'fear'). Tantrum charges straight at the door, horns lowered to spear whoever that is in the darkness.
Cyclonus hisses sharply at Ramjet: "We have already learned more than /your/ life is worth, Ramjet." He's about to elaborate when the door opens.
Ramjet draws his weapon toward the door that the guards stand in front of! "... then again, conveniently we no longer need survivors to figure out what happened." Then, Tantrum does the Predacon equivilent of casting magic missile at the -darkness-. "Good riddance!"
Watching Tantrum charge off is what gives Cyclonus pause, and he steps forward. "SHOW YOURSELF!" he bellows, in the same commanding tone he uses when he makes Long Haul run laps for his own amusement. "I AM CYCLONUS, LORD OF THE DECEPTICONS, AND TO KNOW MY NAME IS TO KNOW THE WRATH OF THE CHAOS-GOD!"
Ramjet stands behind Cyclonus, arm-rifle still raised. At this point, he's wondering if he could just ice Cyclonus with a shot to the head and cobble together a way back with Soundwave.
The darkness resolves itself as a slow, flickering glow fills the room, revealing a large, bulky figure sitting upon a throne. Upon further inspection, it is revealed that the throne is made from the bodies of dead guards and scientists.
The figure stands, slowly and painfully. He is blackened and scorched, every movement of his limbs causing liquid energon to seep through the cracked armour, his body almost unrecognisable, swarthed in electronic bandages that hold most of his form and face together. And when he speaks, it is through a damaged voicebox that sounds like dry autumn leaves.
"FOOL, *I* AM LORD OF THE DECEPTICONS!"
And it is Galvatron.
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> screeches to a stop, all four hooves digging into the ground. "GALVATRON!" After a while, he adds, "But I thought...I mean, we all thought...!"
Ramjet stares in wide-eyed disbelief. He takes a step back out of caution, letting the aim of his rifle fall toward his side. Turning his head slightly, the Decepticon jet coughs and asks the age-old question. "Err.. Lord Galvatron? Is that -you-?!" In the back of his mind, the thick-headed Ramjet realizes his grave, grave mistake.
Cyclonus' look of utter bafflement and shock slowly turns to one of absolute indignance, as his head slowly turns from Galvaton to Ramjet.
Ramjet wonders if he shoots Cyclonus now, he can say Cyke was usurping Galvatron and that he's turned the traitor in!
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> wonders if anyone wants some FUELING.
Galvatron stands there, shaking with rage, his optics burning from his damaged face with the very fire of the pit itself, as he angrily tears off a bandage from his face, taking part of his chin with it. "You /thought/?" He booms, twitching. "You /thought/? You THOUGHT?!" He raises his arm and with a whine and a flash, a huge blast of white-hot plasma energy vomits forth, annihilating a hapless guard. "When did I ever teach you to THINK?"
Soundwave bursts back in to deliver the moral of the story, but stops when he sees Galv.
From within Soundwave, Frenzy begs the question to follow right after, "What'd he say his name wuz!?"
Soundwave says the only reasonable thing: "Lord Galvatron, Soundwave reporting. Awaiting orders.
"Hail Galvatron!" Frenzy shouts from within Soundwave.
"Hail Galvatron!" Ramjet thrusts his arm into the air, hoping it might save him from getting shouted at.
Cyclonus steps forward, his eyes once again fixing on Galvatron, looking this wreck of a robot from feet to crowntips, mouth parting gently in an expression that would seem to befit some kind of robotic religious experience. Finally, he stiffens into a salute, voice choked: "HAIL GALVATRON!"
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> realizes he's the only one who hasn't hailed Galvatron yet! "Uh...on behalf of all the Predacons, HAIL GALVATRON!" There, that's like five 'hails' in one!
Galvatron stalks forwards slowly, his face darkening as ash from his feet lay in his wake. "I am angry Cyclonus. So. So angry. I awoke in this place at the same time that you were restored. But my body had been..." he gestures down at his ruined frame "... SABOTAGED by my captors. I was forced to hide like a DOG while I leant that my place had been taken by... by..."
His optics burn as he lashes out, a bandage-clad hand grabbing another gumby as he lifts him into the air, crushing his head. "By some HOMUNCULUS! Some lifeless COPY!" He throws the body to the ground angrily. "This technician helped me, restored me. No-one is indispensible, Cyclonus. /NO-ONE/. You would do well to remember that"
Soundwave . o O (No one is indispensible..? Clone.)
Ramjet blinks at Galvatron. "Homunculus?" He echoes the word. Thoughts struggle through the density of his cone. "Why.. does that word sound familiar? Uh.. I.. uh.. hm." He quiets as he tries to put the two and two together.
Soundwave, being the closest thing there is to a medic here, strides forward to pass his medical scanners over Galvatron.
BEGIN FLASHBACK MONTAGE
Various clips of Galvatron shooting the Sweeps, Cyclonus, both, Devastator, Wheelie, the Triple Changers, about a bazillion gumby seekers, etc.
END FLASHBACK MONTAGE
"You have taught me that philosophy well, Lord Galvatron," Cyclonus says.
Galvatron slumps down upon his throne of corpses, resting his hand on a decapitated head, as he gazes upon his men. Any scans will show that his body, despite being terribly damaged, is that of Galvatron, and his mind, well... while as crazy as ever, it is still Galvatron.
"The Constructicons!" Galvatron hisses, twitching his hand as he crushes the head to dust in his fist. "They are behind this, with their botched mind transfer operation. We will make them /PAY/! But first I must be repaired. First I must rebuild my forces in secret, before I can take back what is mine by RIGHT!"
As if he cannot decide whether to sit or stand, he rises to his feet again, throwing out a pointed finger at Cyclonus, his armour splitting and cracking again with the sudden movement. "CYCLONUS! Summon my DELUXE INSECTICONS!"
Mecha-Bull <Tantrum> says, "Wait a second! You're saying that...that 'MEGATRON' is an impostor? Who is he? Where'd he come from?" He snorts in amusement. "And Frenzy...he's gettin' everybody to swear allegiance to him! HRAH!"
Soundwave claims all kinds of credit here. "Declarations of allegience by Frenzy intended to cover Intelligence operation designed to expose Megatron as imposter."
"Does it matter, Tantrum? Megatron... is /dead/." Cyclonus allows a cruel smirk, removing his helmet and exposing his funny-looking robot head. From the crown of his robot skull a long stalk emerges, with a wide-barreled tip with little finlets. It emits a loud tone in two short, sharp bursts. "INSECTICONS! /TO ME/!"
Ramjet stares at Cyclonus, aghast. "..this just keeps getting more unbelieveable by the nanosecond! I thought you were Skywarp!"
"Skywarp is /dead/ as well," Cyclonus notes, flatly.
"HAIL *kik* BOMBSHELL!!" screams Barrage as the garrishly-colored rhinoceros beetle sweeps into view, flying about with horrendously annoying buzzing sounds before coming to a stop nearby Cyclonus. "It's *kik* simple -logic- anyway. Galvatron is an -upgrade-. Why follow a -downgrade loser-? Even a *kik* /idiot/ would know that."
Venom and Ransack similarly scamper over, joining in the "HAIL BOMBSHELL!" cheer as Cyclonus replaces his helmet, looking displeased and a little exploited. Lord knows where Chop Shop is.
"Well done Soundwave, YOUR position in my army is assured at least" Galvatron scowls, looking around the room as his Deluxe Insecticons swarm in. "Whatever this 'Megatron' is - a clone, a Quintesson ABOMINATION, Avatar HIMSELF... we must be careful. We must plan our moves carefully or all is lost!" He points a gauntleted hand at Cyclonus. "Gather those loyal to me Cyclonus, and sew chaos amongst those who are not. Send out messengers, find me THUNDERWING and recall SCORPONOK from deep space."
He turns to Soundwave, pointing at him. "And YOU Soundwave. YOU will find a way to restore me to my former glory, to discover the truth behind this ABOMINATION who dares to sit on my throne, and to discover those who would stand against me!"
"At once, Lord Galvatron!" Cyclonus says, and with wordless gestures, dispatches Venom and Ransack, who fly off into... space.
"Uh.." Ramjet sputters out as undead-Galvatron spouts his orders. It's bad enough he's rifles-deep in Insecticons. Now Galvatron makes mention of that wacko scientist Thunderwing, and worse, Scorponok. There's always been rumors that mech was a bit of a massive headcase. Something is wrong, Ramjet realizes as the empty feeling in his energo-processor worsens. Yet he cannot put his finger on it. Why does homunculus sound so familiar? And why aren't the Sweeps with Galvatron? Can he ever get to ream Fusillade with his cone again? The questions weigh upon Ramjet's mind like a 50 ton semi. For now, Ramjet remains quiet. The last thing he wants to do is draw attention to himself! Ramjet keeps his posture straight and adopts a serious pose. One hand on his elbow, the other raised up to cradle his chin. He looks thoughtful and considerate of Galvatron's decrees.. even if he cannot believe them!
Well. Galv isn't going to like the answer to this one.. so Soundwave won't tell him. He'll find a nice scapegoat to blow the whistle. "As you command, Lord Galvatron."
Ramjet says to Bombclonus, "Lord Cyclonus, you're uh, our ride back to base."
"So I am," Cyclonus notes gravely. "I shall return, Lord Galvatron."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "Dirge, do you read?"
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "Find Thrust and then use the Spacebridge to return to Cybertron. Go to the Aerospace wing of Nightsiege and break open the emergency-only box."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "We'll need the strongest booze ever made."
<Decepticon> Dirge says, "Is it an emergency this time?"
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "You have NO idea."
<Decepticon> Dirge says, "The last time we opened that box, it was because Galvatron flew in and disintegrated Starscream, may he burn in Hell. Does this compare?"
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "Uh... hm."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "In that case."
<Decepticon> Dirge says, ".. or was it when Legacy destroyed Darkmount?"
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "Do you remember when Unicron's hand ripped into the crust of Cybertron?"
<Decepticon> Dirge says, "I believe that has happened at least twice."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "Well it's above Legacy fragging Darkmount, but not as bad as Unicron tearing into Cybertron. Break open the super emergency cask."
<Decepticon> Dirge muses, "To light our darkest hour.."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "No. Just make it slightly more tolerable."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "Oh and bring the cones of silence. This is top secret."
<Decepticon> Dirge sighs. "That is the phrase written on the cask, Ramjet. Thrust put it there. Except it is spelt 'durkest' due to his intolerable idiocy."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet says, "...."
<Decepticon> D-56 Ramjet sigh.